英语自我介绍 帮我看看怎么样 有什么错误吗Good morning,teachers!It's a great pleasure to have this interview here today.My name is XXX.I am come from XXX Language School .I'm XX years old now.My major is German.I have learned it for

英语自我介绍 帮我看看怎么样 有什么错误吗Good morning,teachers!It's a great pleasure to have this interview here today.My name is XXX.I am come from XXX Language School .I'm XX years old now.My major is German.I have learned it for
英语自我介绍 帮我看看怎么样 有什么错误吗
Good morning,teachers!
It's a great pleasure to have this interview here today.
My name is XXX.I am come from XXX Language School .I'm XX years old now.My major is German.I have learned it for 3years.During these years ,I have got many certificates .Such as XXX,XXX,Germany certificate and so on.I used to be the organization member of class.I also worked in the Student Union before.So i have the ability of organization.I can deal with problems calmly.I am a smart girl with kindness and responsiblity.I have many hobbies.In my spare time,I like drawing ,writing and doing sports.
Because i am keen on learning languages,so i choose your English major.I want to improve my oral English and English level in the future.I am eager to enter this school.So i will keep working hard and trying my best to realize my dream.
Thank you.

英语自我介绍 帮我看看怎么样 有什么错误吗Good morning,teachers!It's a great pleasure to have this interview here today.My name is XXX.I am come from XXX Language School .I'm XX years old now.My major is German.I have learned it for
觉得还好,不过because不可以是一句子的第一个词,把它跟上面那句连起来.而且是playing sports,不是doing sports.I have been learning it for 3 years.
I also worked in the student union before,so,i have the ability of organizing things neatly and correctly.I am a smart girl with kindness and responsibilty,and I am able to calmly deal with problems.
so i chose.最后可能用reveal my dream,会好一点.

一般自我介绍是说ladies and gettlemen
for me to be interviewed here
I come from
the ability of organizing
improve my level of English and practice my oral English

• “I am come from”有误，应是I am from或I come from

• “I'm XX years old now.”这里now最好不要

• “I have learned it for 3years”应是I have been learning it for 3years

• “Germany certificate”应是 Certificate in German 

• ”responsiblity“应是a sense of responsibility

• trying my best to 应是 try to
  
  

I come from 没有am

i am come from中去掉am
realize my dream是不是可以改为make my dream come true